Just like people, relationships grow and change. While you might have been head over heels for each other when you first started dating, things may have slowed down.
You might be frustrated, while your boyfriend may be losing interest. If this has gone on for awhile, you may be wondering
how to rekindle a relationship that seems to have gone cold. It’s always hard to realize that your boyfriend is less passionate about the relationship than he once was. It’s a shock to your self-esteem, and you may start feeling sad or insecure. This could make you lash out at him, which can lead to fights and further alienation from each other.
Luckily, there is a better way. The following seven tactics can help you go beyond just fixing a broken relationship; you can emerge with a stronger bond with your boyfriend than you ever imagined.
1. Understand the Importance of Touch
As relationships progress and “settle down,” we often stop touching our partners as much as we once did. Less touch means that you and your boyfriend will produce less of a bonding hormone called oxytocin. Given enough time, this could lead to feelings of estrangement and alienation between you and your boyfriend.
So hug him, kiss him or give him a back rub if you are sitting together on the sofa. Cuddle him in bed or brush his arm as you walk past him in the house. These little affectionate moves are more than mere gestures. They are scientifically proven stimuli that can help bring the good vibes back to your relationship dynamic if you think that your boyfriend is pulling away.
2. Get Away From the Everyday
If you have the spare time and a little extra cash, plan a weekend getaway with your boyfriend. Taking time out and leaving your everyday surroundings can help you reconnect and rediscover the things that made you fall in love with each other in the first place. Relaxing in an environment that isn’t familiar can go a long way towards easing some of the tension in your relationship. You don’t even have to necessarily leave town; a hotel room right in the center of your city can help you relax and unwind while shaking up your run-of-the-mill routine.
3. Suggest a Shared Activity
Spending time together is important, but it shouldn’t always be on the couch watching Netflix. Suggest an activity or a hobby that you and your boyfriend can do together that will be fun and engaging. Are you both active people?
If so, why not train for a 5K run together, or explore rock climbing? If you’re film buffs, consider attending a festival or an arthouse screening. Make the activity something that you both love to reinforce your compatability.
4. Be Spontaneous
Everyone loves surprises, and men are no different. An unexpected gesture can breathe new life into a staid and boring relationship. Drop by his work with lunch from his favorite restaurant or surprise him with concert tickets to see a band that he’s always wanted to see. Being spontaneous will help your boyfriend remember why he connected with you in the first place. Remember, you’re still dating each other, and thoughtful surprises should not be relegated to the “honeymoon period.”
5. Make Time for Yourself—And Give Him Some Alone Time Too
This option might seem a little strange if you feel like your boyfriend is pulling away from you. However, setting apart some time for yourself and suggesting that he do the same can work really well to reset a stagnant romance. Having a day or two off can help you both find your sense of self, which may have been compromised with too much time spent together.
There is a certain wisdom in the two familiar proverbs—familiarity breeds contempt, and absence makes the heart grow fonder. Just be careful and make sure that a day or two doesn’t stretch into a week or two weeks, or you may end up losing the relationship entirely. Don’t go AWOL – check in with him once or twice during the time you’re apart.
6. Map Out Your Intentions
When we’re in long-term relationships, we tend to start focusing on the mundane issues of the day, week or month. In other words, we often begin to coast and take the direction of the relationship for granted.
Being mutually aware of where you feel the union is headed is one of the best ways to keep things alive and on track. Make your future together an open
topic. If he knows that you are invested in the relationship, it will help inspire him to be equally committed.
Related: Text The Romance Back Strategy
7. Don’t Be Afraid to be Sexy
This step is last because simply jumping onto your partner isn’t the sole answer to the question of how to fix a broken relationship. That said, sexual compatibility is one of the key aspects of a relationship, and if it suffers, the whole house can come tumbling down. Surprise him when he gets home from work with some new lingerie that you want to model for him. Buy a sexy couples game that gets you discussing what, well, gets you both going.
Talking openly and honestly about such intimate matters may seem awkward initially, but can positively help you and your boyfriend get back on track. Discussing your sex life in a mature manner helps pave the way to a better physical relationship, which will lead to a more intimate overall bond.
Related: Text The Romance Back
Rekindling Romance: An Active and Ongoing Process
Ultimately, all relationships need effort and dedication from both sides. If you are the only party invested, things will not work out in the long run. Hopefully, these tweaks to your approach will help spark your boyfriend to do his part for a balanced relationship.
Fortunately, the qualities that make a bond unique are the same ones that can be used to make it stronger as time goes on. Rescuing an ailing romance may seem like a daunting endeavor, but a healthy relationship that enriches both your lives is worth its weight in gold. So get out there and start mining 🙂